Tuesday, January 28, 2014

Teaser Tuesday 204: I'm the Vampire, That's Why

Teaser Tuesdays is a weekly bookish meme, hosted by MizB of Should Be Reading. Anyone can play along! Just do the following:

* Grab your current book or recent read.
* Share a few "teaser" sentences from somewhere in the book.
* BE CAREFUL NOT TO INCLUDE SPOILERS! (Make sure that what you share doesn’t give too much away. You don’t want to ruin the book for others!)
* Share the title and author so that other participants can add the book to their TBR Lists if they like your teaser!



JUST FINISHED: I'm the Vampire, That's Why by Michele Bardsley. Fans of MaryJanice Davidson and Charlaine Harris may want to check this one out.


The night I died, I was wrestling a garbage can to the curb.

I had a perfectly healthy fourteen-year-old son who should have taken out the garbage after dinner, but he, and let me quote him directly hear, "forgot."

~ * ~ * ~ * ~

I don’t remember how I disentangled my sorry self from the bushes. I have vague memories of the roses' too sweet scent as I crawled across the street and collapsed near my knocked-over garbage cans.

For those who know me, meeting my end amid the muttered curses and spilled refuse was not a great shock. But, shock or not, it was still a crappy way to go.


(From chapter one)


ABOUT THE BOOK:
Book one of series
Genre: Urban fantasy/paranormal romance/mystery


Broken Heart is the city with the highest rate of divorce and highest percentage of single parents in Oklahoma. And I, Jessica Matthews, have been a member of that club ever since my husband dumped me for his twenty-something secretary and then had the gall to die in a car accident.

Now I’m not just a single mother trying to make ends meet in this crazy world . . . . I’m also a vampire. One minute I was taking out the garbage; the next I awoke sucking on the thigh of superhot vampire Patrick O’Halloran, who’d generously offered his femoral artery to save me.

But though my stretch marks have disappeared and my vision has improved, I can’t rest until the thing that did this to me is caught. My kids’ future is at stake—figuratively and literally. As is my sex life. Although I wouldn’t mind finding myself attached to Patrick’s juicy thigh again, I learned that once a vampire does the dirty deed, it hitches her to the object of her affection for at least one hundred years. I just don’t know if I’m ready for that kind of commitment. . . .





26 comments:

Unknown said...

Sounds great!

http://carabosseslibrary.blogspot.com/2014/01/teaser-tuesdays_28.html

sherry fundin said...

Had me cracking up. Sounds like an awesome read. Here's mine:

http://www.fundinmental.com/?p=10396

Anonymous said...

What a great teaser, very funny. That last sentence says so much :-)

Heather said...

Valentina: It was a fun read! :)

Heather said...

Sherry: Thank you - the snarky voice of the narrator kept me laughing throughout.

Heather said...

Thanks, Cleopatra -- and doesn't it? LOL ☺

Jessica @ a GREAT read said...

OOoh very nice tease!

Thanks for visiting my blog!

Laurel-Rain Snow said...

I'm not a fan of vampire stories, but this one does sound good. Thanks for sharing...and for visiting my blog.

Anonymous said...

This is going to go on my too read list - sounds great!

Love your opening tease

Thank you for visiting my tease.

Heather said...

Thanks, Jessica! I thought you might like. :)

Heather said...

Laurel-Rain: I avoided vampires for a long time, until friends recommended a couple series to me. I don't snap up every vampire book/series, but every now and then something new catches my eye, or -- like this one -- is recommended by friends.

Heather said...

Thanks, Sally -- I hope you like it! ☺

Yvonne said...

This looks good. I wanted to read this author but never got around to it. I will, though.

Unknown said...

Sounds cute. I am pretty sure I have this on my TBR mountain somewhere. Thanks for visiting my teaser. Happy reading!

Alice Audrey said...

This looks like a good one. I like that kind of sassy attitude.

Heather said...

Yvonne: It was good! This is one that was recommended by some of our friends in the Cozy Mysteries group at GR.

Heather said...

Kathy M: I hope you get around to unearthing and reading your copy soon! :)

Heather said...

Alice: It was definitely a fun read. The heroine was definitely sassy, lol.

Unknown said...

Oh, those are so funny! Thanks for sharing!

Heather said...

Thanks, Andrea -- glad you liked! ☺

Shelley Munro said...

This sounds like a fun read. Loved the trash teaser. 14 year olds get out of everything by forgetting!

T.F. Walsh said...

What a cool sounding teaser.. very nice.

Heather said...

Shelley: Yes, they do. I think you'd like series. ☺

Heather said...

Thanks, Tania! :)

kayerj said...

now that's a great teaser! I love that line "The night I died"

Heather said...

Kelley: Thank you. It's not often a book opens with those four words, is it? *g*