Thursday, August 09, 2007

Thursday Thirteen #21: Civility

August is National “Win with Civility Month.” There’s no doubt that the world is overflowing with bad manners and rude behavior. Few seem to realize that if you treat others with kindness and respect, not only are they more likely to treat you the same, but you will feel good about yourself, knowing you are doing right. Taken from George Washington’s “110 Rules of Civility & Decent Behavior in Company and Conversation,” here are a few tips in how to treat others and behave in public.

1. Every Action done in Company, ought to be with Some Sign of Respect, to those that are Present. (The golden rule: treat everyone with respect.)

2. Show Nothing to your Friend that may affright him. (Be considerate of others and do not embarrass them.)

3. Be not hasty to believe flying Reports to the Disparagement of any. (Don’t believe everything you hear.)

4. Be not apt to relate News if you know not the truth thereof. In Discoursing of things you Have heard Name not your Author always A Secret Discover not. (Don’t talk about something unless you have all of the facts.)

5. Turn not your Back to others especially in Speaking, Jog not the Table or Desk on which Another reads or writes, lean not upon any one. (Don’t ignore someone who is speaking to you, or jostle the table while they are trying to write – or stamp.)

6. Be no Flatterer, neither Play with any that delights not to be Play'd Withal. (In other words, stop being a suck up. No one likes a sycophant.)

7. If You Cough, Sneeze, Sigh, or Yawn, do it not Loud but Privately; and Speak not in your Yawning, but put Your handkerchief or Hand before your face and turn aside. (I don’t know about you, but I hate it when someone coughs or sneezes on me. And then there are those who talk with their mouths full. Yuck!)

8. When Another Speaks be attentive your Self and disturb not the Audience if any hesitate in his Words help him not nor Prompt him without desired, Interrupt him not, nor Answer him till his Speech be ended. (Plain and simple: Don’t interrupt. If there’s something you want to say, or ask, wait ‘til they are finished.)

9. Reproach none for the Infirmities of Nature, nor Delight to Put them that have in mind thereof. (Don’t make fun of people; treat others as you want to be treated.)

10. Being to advise or reprehend any one, consider whether it ought to be in public or in Private; presently, or at Some other time in what terms to do it & in reproving Show no Sign of Cholar but do it with all Sweetness and Mildness. (When you must give advice or criticism, consider the timing, whether it should be given in public or private, the manner and above all be gentle.)

11. A Man ought not to value himself of his Achievements, or rare Qualities of wit; much less of his riches Virtue or Kindred. (Be modest; don’t be boastful or gloat about your own accomplishments.)

12. Wherein you reprove Another be unblameable yourself; for example is more prevalent than Precepts. (Actions speak louder than words; when you point a finger at someone else, there are always three pointing back at you.)

13. Associate yourself with Men of good Quality if you Esteem your own Reputation; for 'is better to be alone than in bad Company. (Be particular with whom you associate; it is better to be alone than to keep bad, or negative, company.)

14. Read no Letters, Books, or Papers in Company but when there is a Necessity for the doing of it you must ask leave: come not near the Books or Writings of Another so as to read them unless desired or give your opinion of them unasked also look not nigh when another is writing a Letter. (Don’t ignore others by reading in their company, and don’t read over someone’s shoulder.)

Links to other Thursday Thirteens!

1. Jenna 2. Jennifer Shirk 3. Lanie Fuller 4. Rae Jenkins
5. Shelley Munro 6. Robin Rotham 7. Gina Ardito
8. Sara Thacker 9. Adelle Laudan 10. Elle Fredrix
11. Debbie Mumford 12. Ember Case 13. Rhonda Stapleton
14. Ann Aguirre 15. Ava Rose 16. Jana
17. Tempest 18. JAC 19. Emma Peterson 20. Briana
21. Amelia June 22. Paige Tyler 23. Jenna Allen
24. Eva Gale 25. Lis 26. Savannah Chase

(leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!

The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!


Shelley Munro said...

This is a really good list. If more people followed these rules the world would be a much better place.

Lanie said...

I agree. It is a good list and the world would be better off if people at least tried to follow those a little more.

But I guess since everyone is guilty of those things, I won't point fingers! (small joke, I know, I'm awful at them. *sigh*

Robin L. Rotham said...

Wow, I know a couple of people I'm going to send over here for a refresher course...

Great list!

Heather said...

Shelley~ Definitely! I try, but heaven knows some people (ie: a few of my neighbors) sure don't make it easy.

Lanie~ kill me, woman! *g*

Robin~ Thank you. I think we all know a few people who could use a crash course, or at least a mild refresher. lol

Gina Ardito said...

Wow! How little has changed that we still need to be reminded about good behavior. Very cool list.

Sara Thacker said...

Good list. I'm glad you added number 14 in. I would like to add to that, don't make comments about your email unless you plan on sharing the email with those around you. Drives me crazy when my husband does this.

Tempest Knight said...

Not sneezing in public? Uh... that's a tough one to do, no?

Adelle said...

I think every teenager I know should get a copy of these lol
Including my own sons at times.
Happy T13!

Jennifer Shirk said...

As true today as it was back then.

Great list. :)

Elle Fredrix said...

Excellent. It seems like manners and simple respect have gone out of fashion, or something. And we really need to get it back in style.

Debbie Mumford said...

Thanks for a much needed reminder. I remember when my son was marked as a "problem" child for answering his teacher with "yes, ma'am" and "no, ma'am." Seriously. She thought he was mouthing off. We had to go to school and explain that he'd been taught to speak respectfully to his elders. *shakes head* That one still amazes me.

Ember Case said...

Civility rules never grow old. Great list!

Heather Rae Scott said...

I'm speechless. There's not one thing I can say about this list that hasn't already been said. GREAT list. I wish more people would read it. '-)

Rhonda Stapleton said...

YAY! What a great list. I wish common social courtesy existed more in the world. *sigh*

Paige Tyler said...

Great list!


My TT is at

Ava Rose Johnson said...

I think 4 and 12 are pretty damn important.
If only people would pay attention, *sigh*

Ann Aguirre said...

Good rules, there. Nice to see some things don't change with the times.

Jana said...

Good list. More folks aught to read it.

I wish there was one on shared microwave etiquette. Burned my hand yesterday because an impatient toad was rushing me to get my stuff out of there...and it had JUST dinged like a second before he started harrassing me. AND THEN...he didn't even use it. He used the other one and walked out and left it for like 10 minutes! If I were a four letter word user I'd have certainly used a few on him! :-p~~~

BTW--Boy am I glad we don't speak so formally now. Thanks for the interpretations! hehehehehe

Amelia June said...

Boy, even George Washington hated a kiss-ass. Who knew?

If only my children could follow all these rules--specifically the "don't jostle the table" rule...

Happy TT!

Heather said...

Gina~ Haven't gotten very far, have we?

Sara~ Ooo...that's a good one.

Tempest~ He's not saying don't sneeze in public, but try to do so discreetly, and use a handkerchief or tissue.

Adelle~ ROFL! I know a few parents of teenagers who could use a copy as well. lol

Heather said...

Jenn and Ember~ Thank you!

Debbie~ You're kidding me! She thought he was being rude for addressing her with respect? Amazing!

Elle~ "And we really need to get back in style" -- definately!

Thanks Paige and Rae!

Rhonda~ Would definitely make a huge difference in this crazy world, wouldn't it?

Eva Gale said...

Oh, man that is a fantastic list.

Heather said...

Ava~ Thank you, they are certainly two important ones!

Jana~ How rude! Not just his impatience, but then to walk away and leave his food sitting in there for ten minutes when someone else might have wanted to use it? Incredibly rude.

Thanks Ann, and thanks for visiting!

Amelia~ You know, I actually don't find it difficult to believe he disliked false flattery. He did, afterall, refuse the presidency at first.

Jenna Allen said...

You should do another one of these during the holiday shopping season. Everyone seems to have a manners fart just about then.

Heather said...

Thank you, Eva. Glad people like!

Jenna~ So true about holiday shoppers needing remedial lessons in manners. I swear some of them get ruder and more impatient every year!